As I was washing dishes the other day, I had this random thought pop in my head. Do I really have free will? If God is the orchestrator of all things, and He knows the very thoughts in my head, and knows what I’m going to do before I even do it, do I really have a choice in what I say or do throughout the day, throughout the week, throughout my entire life? I often think that I am the product of my choices, that I am here because of the choices I made, which then determined my outcome. But if I am a Child of God, who has preordained my steps since before I was born, when I was in my mother’s womb, then do I really have a choice in what I do and say? Have I ever had a choice?
I sat down with God for a few days, and God revealed to me that though He has ordained my life to be the way that it is, it is only this way because I made a choice, and it’s a choice I have to make daily, which makes me the product of my choices. That choice is whether to stay in the Will of God, or to stray against His Will. Every decision I make, albeit big or small, is rooted in some way in the grand Will of God, and my decisions, the daily choices that I make, are contingent upon whether God wants me to do what I am doing or not. Even in those times when I have to make a huge decision that I know will impact my life for the next five years, and I actually have no idea where that decision will lead me in two days, I have to decide whether I am going to submit to the Will of God or submit to my own devices, safety nets, and limited scope of view. By deciding daily to operate under the Will of God, I am exercising my “free will” and submitting my will to a God whose Will is far more precise, rewarding, and fulfilling. So do I have free will? Yes. Is it really free, that remains to be seen. Then again, faith being the evidence of things NOT SEEN, I guess only God will know, eh?